Agitated Aunts Alice and Ada and an abominably agile adder are accidentally abreast ascending an ancient archway at an Abbey.
Hire a Girl to Manufacture
You Deliver and Collect Cash every day
The Monkey is confused. Why would you “Hire a Girl to Manufacture?” Shouldn’t that girl be in school? Wouldn’t hiring a girl mean hiring child labor? Are boys and men unable to make potato chips? Are genetics somehow involved? Couldn’t a woman run a potato chip business?
Uncle Boris loved music and Uncle Boris knew the ladies loved music and Uncle Boris likes the ladies so starting a band seemed like a good idea.
It was the ’60’s and Uncle Boris formed “The Boris-Tones.” Uncle Boris met the other four musicians while attending an interpretive dance performance. The dance piece was called “I Gave You Marmalade To Show You I Care.” The choreographer said the piece was inspired by the lives of Sacco and Vanzetti.
When asked what marmalade had to do with Sacco and Vanzetti the choreographer replied, “I’m an artist and I do not have to justify my work.”
The quartet accompanying the performance was excellent and Uncle Boris approached them after the show. Uncle Boris convinced them to explore the possibility of creating music that was both inspired and had commercial appeal.
They practiced for several months in the back room of Enrico’s Proletariat Paradise, an army surplus store owned by the bass player who was named Sebastian. Sebastian liked the name Enrico and it was his store so he could call it anything he liked.
Their first and only performance was legendary. Uncle Boris played violin. Uncle Boris didn’t know how to play the violin but the audience was so high it didn’t seem to matter.
The entire show consisted of one extended piece called “I Love You So Much I Could Fling My Poop.”
Sadly, for an encore, the band did indeed show the audience how much they loved them.